REAL RELATIONSHIPS: Hitting Bottom through a Milkshake Dump
CLICK BELOW TO LISTEN TO A LIVE CONVERSATION WITH STEPHEN AND SONJA FRANCIS OF “LOVE LIFE NOW SEMINARS” TALKING ABOUT THE TURNAROUND IN THEIR RELATIONSHIP
Listening to Stephen and Sonja talk about the “near-death” experience of their relationship
Stephen and Sonja Francis
- where arguments in the early years of their marriage led to an attack with a Milkshake, I am brought to a place of faith and hope and purpose. Like Amy and myself, Stephen and Sonja now lead seminars, they coach clients, they are becoming leaders in this field. And like Amy and myself, they are not perfect – as they share on the audio. Working with people in the field of relationship training is less about being perfect and more about being a product of the process. I am always reminded of those old “Hair Club for Men” commercials: I’m not only the President, I’m also a member.
Amy and I are hardly perfect. My goodness, we just led a public teleseminar and we had our snippy moments. My fault, her fault — we’re both Type A, Dominant, “IT’s MY TURN NOW” people. We’re always going to be that. But we are devoted to working on ourselves everyday. I’m willing to admit that I’m not always getting the results I want out of me, but that doesn’t turn off my commitment. Blame has no place in my relationship – and if it’s there, it’s probably because I haven’t accepted something about Amy, or about myself.
We’ve been to that dark place, that Milkshake-Over-Your-Head place. Sometimes it feels like it’s right around the corner, and sometimes it feels like it’s on vacation and it’s letting us have a run of harmonious happiness. What keeps us coming back to each other? Doing the work. Keeping agreements, creating safety, asking for dialogues, showing up to work with others, healing what needs to be healed in our family of origin. What brings us back to each other are those moments when Amy will say something like, “I couldn’t have married anyone else.” When she witnesses me taking action to making something right in our relationship, with my family, in my career, with my health — it’s like the feeling of a proud parent who loves you like a forever friend.
So – if you are getting close to a “Milkshake Moment” – it’s okay. Dump it. Then make another one and drink it. With two straws. You’re not the only one who’s been there.
EXPERIENCE MICHAEL SHERMAN OF COURAGEOUS LOVING INTERVIEWING STEPHEN AND SONJA LIVE THIS THURSDAY NIGHT, 9PM EST. CLICK: HERE
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Hey Michael,
You know what just popped into my mind? Wouldn’t it be neat if “Courageous Loving” was a required class in high school? All the students and professors and principals taking a class on the 8 steps. I think the kids would eat it up! They would definitely like picking a visualization and practicing it. And Im sure it would be one of the only subjects that each child (and teacher) could use his/her whole life.
If most of us are going to be married or in some kind of intimate relationship, we should get some schooling on how to make it work. If nothing else we can explore where we were damaged and how it effects us and our relationships and what kind of partner we are potentially going to attrack and how to handle it…..etc. Priceless information! Did Home Ec really do anything for us?
I can just see that kind of class where students and teachers are honest and open and vulnerable, being such a wonderful tool for cultivating respect and encouragement and compassion. The world might be a better place because of it.
Food for thought.
I’m totally with you. What if we learned this stuff in school? We’d all be in a better place. Who cares about the war of 1812?Michael Sherman – http://www.CourageousLovingNation.com
An add-on: And we may save one more poor defenseless milkshake from being wasted!